Heymann & Fletcher

Addressing child-parent rifts in the aftermath of divorce

Divorce can occur for many reasons. Sometimes, married couples naturally grow apart, and divorce is both mutual and amicable. However, in other circumstances, one spouse may feel betrayed by the other. This perceived betrayal could come in the form of a physical or emotional affair with another person.

If you think that your child is mature enough, you may decide to explain to them the reasons why the divorce is occurring. Even if you decide not to share the details, they may be intuitive enough to understand what has happened. In this case, they may become angry at the parent that they perceive to be at fault. This can cause significant problems for the family unit, especially if the child refuses to see the parent at whom they are angry.

While all children have the right to be angry and to express their own emotions, both parents should try to present a united front in regard to doing what is best for the child. If you are unsure about how to react to your child's anger toward the other parent, you should take on board the following tips.

Try to be as neutral as possible

While you may be deeply hurt by the actions of your ex, it is important that you try not to criticize your ex in front of your child. You should try to take a neutral stance for their benefit.

Address the anger directly

Instead of accepting the displays of anger as normal behavior, you should address it directly. Make sure that your child feels seen and that their emotions are validated. By creating a safe space to talk about issues, it's likely that your child will get the reassurance that they need.

Remind the child that they are loved by both parents

Regardless of what is going on in the marriage, your child needs to feel loved. Make sure that they are shown love not just in words, but through actions, too.

If you are navigating a divorce with children, it is important that you prepare yourself for a financially successful outcome. In order to do this, you should make sure to fully understand the law in New Jersey.

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Toll Free: 800-481-8549
Phone: 862-781-0029